Without, the frost-the blinding snow, The storm-wind's moody madness- Within, the firelight's ruddy glow, And childhood's nest of gladness.
I remember a conversation I once had with a writer whose mother had been born in May. In discussing her parent's habits and character, the girl happened to mention that "Mother was a tall woman." "You must take after your father then," I remarked, since the girl herself was only of average height. She smiled. And I shall never forget what she said. "I didn't mean in inches. Mother was shorter than I am. That was just soul talk." The girl was a Pisces, the sign that looks deep inside you.
She was right. A Taurus female is a tall woman. Even if she measures under five feet, she can reach tall enough to meet almost any emergency life chooses to throw her way. In many ways, the Taurean female is the salt of the earth, a combination of most of the sterling qualities every male looks for and seldom finds. She may have a violent temper that would frighten a strong man into running for the woods (or at least ducking under a tablecloth), but she won't go on a raging rampage without god provocation. Ordinarily, if you don't torment her beyond human endurance, or if Fate doesn't hand her a really rough bunch of cards, she'll play the game of life freely, with cool, admirable calm. Her candor and basic honesty are undiluted with normal feminine tricks ay tears. The Taurean girl has more moral and emotional courage than many a tough male, but she has enough confidence in her own sex to let you be the boss, if you want the job. If you don't fill it, she may grab control and run things herself, but she'd much rather have it the other way around. She seeks a real man.
That's because she how’s she's a real woman, and she's proud of it. To her, being a woman doesn't necessarily mean being an incorrigible flirt, a mental fluff ball or a mewing kitten who pretends to be weak to get her own way. It won't be long before you see she has a mind of her own, and it's quite strong though not to have to resort to teasing to gain an objective.
There's enough self-control in the average Taurus women make-up to hold back a team of horses (a fair idea of the force of her hidden will), if she chooses to exercise it. Let's hope she does. With an Aries or Leo ascendant 01 Moon, she may be capable of occasional cruelty or frequent emotional storms and with heavy Pisces or Gemini influences in her natal chart, she may be more restless and wavering-but the typical Taurean female practices self restraint in all areas at most times. It's a good thing, because her normally placid exterior conceals a sensual nature that could stand a little checking.
Men always appreciate her gracious tendency to take People as they are, without quibbling. She's as much at h»me with a scientist who studies tsetse flies in the Congo as with the sword swallower in the side show. They're doing what comes naturally; they're not phonies and that's what counts with her. Her close friends may be weird Matures straight out of the world of Toulouse-Lautrec, 01 they may be Norman Rockwell paintings come to life.
But they will be real people, not stuffed shirts or statues. When she runs across someone she dislikes, she doesn't start a big campaign to destroy him or challenge his ideals and motives. She simply avoids him. The Taurus woman can show frigid indifference to her enemies, but if she counts you as a friend, she'll be loyal through all your ups and downs. Her determination to stick with you would make the relationship between Damon and Pythias look like a casual acquaintance.
You can drive a Maxwell, climb a flag pole, get locked up in the pokey or wear daisies in your hair. You are her friend, and somehow she'll justify your actions. There's just a small catch here. She'll doggedly expect you to return her blind allegiance and unswerving loyalty. If you don't give her your complete devotion in return, she can sulk in the comer like a gloomy, gray cloud of repressed resentment.
This isn't the same thing as jealousy, however. The average Taurus woman will take the masculine hobby of girl watching in stride. Unlike the Aries or Leo woman, she won't turn scarlet with rage every time you openly admire a pretty girl. It takes more than a casual flirtation or kissing a good (female) friend goodnight on the cheek to arouse her Taurean anger. If you go beyond the bounds of her idea of fair play, she can be a holy terror on wheels, but the line is drawn with generous strokes. She'll have to be really pressed to the wall in some way to explode in typical Taurus fury. You can go ahead and wink at that attractive cashier, but don't test her patience too far. It does have a limit, boundless as it appears to be. If you've never seen her mad, leave well enough alone.
These women aren't dominated by strictly mental goals. That's not meant to imply that the Taurus female isn't smart and clever. She can match brains with the brightest men and women, but she's not fiercely interested in figuring out the theory of relativity or delving into abstractions. Multiple university degrees don't impress or thrill her. Just one is sufficient to gain her respect. Practical common sense and the ability to understand the fundamentals of any subject is, to her, essential. But the typical Taurean girl isn't an intellectual who reads the philosophers for kicks, and intricate ideologies are not her forte. She's a solid, practical thinker, with no frills or showy mental gymnastics. Her feet are planted on terra firma, and there are definitely no wings attached to her solid heels. Taurus women are seldom restless-they keep their heads and their balance. The Taurean perspective remains normally straight and true, with no twists and turns or distortions (though a Gemini Moon can put her in a bit of a whirl).
She's strictly a physical creature. That will undoubtedly interest you, but to interest her, an object or an idea has to appeal to her finely tuned senses. She doesn't want to hear that it's "good for her," that "everybody else is doing it," or that it will "stimulate her mentally." That sort of persuasion will make her yawn. To respond with genuine excitement, she has to derive some sensual satisfaction from everything she does.
You’ll seldom see a Taurus woman stuffing a few arti¬ficial blooms in a vase. Her flowers must be real, and have am honest feel or fragrance. She'll gather huge bunches off pussywillow and bittersweet in the spring and fall, and fill the house with sturdy mums and dahlias in the summer. Her perfume will usually be exotic and lingering, though some Taurean women lean in the opposite direction, and prefer the odor of squeaking clean hair and skin. Taurus girls will be visibly moved by freshly washed sheets saturated with the sweet smell of sunshine or the delicious aroma of bread baking in the oven. She's spiritually aroused by the scent of the morning paper, the intoxi¬cating odor of newly cut grass after a spring rain, burning wax candles or the smoke from a pile of smoldering autumn leaves. This should clue you to use a good brand o»f shaving lotion, rub some damp newsprint on your ears, tuck a burned leaf in your lapel and turn on the sprinklers just before you kiss her goodnight. Unpleasant odors affect her just as drastically, in a reverse way. This is not a girl who will appreciate a pet skunk, even if he has been de¬odorized. Don't take her on a fish fry unless you take along a can of floral spray. It's the cooking odor that causes the problem. The fragrance of fish fresh out of the stream is different; that's natural. The stables won't offend her delicate nostrils, either. Mother Nature again. You may have to make a careful list if you want to woo her with old factory success.
Colors send her senses soaring, too, the richer the better. Every shade of blue, from powder to indigo, will weaken her strong resistance. So will rose and pink. Wear a blue tie and a shocking pink shirt when you visit her, but not at the same time. Remember, she also has a sense of harmony, and you don't want to look like a co-ed nursery.
Her food must taste just right, and she'll usually sprinkle on the seasoning generously (unless she has a Virgo or Capricorn ascendant). Be sure to take her to places with the best chefs, because flat hamburgers and bland pea soup leave her emotionally cold. If you're lucky, she'll invite you for a home-cooked meal, and you may propose before dessert is served. When this girl ties on an apron, it's not just to make cinnamon toast. It's always a good idea to drop in on her with an empty stomach. A typical Taurus woman can cook her way right into your heart, and her kitchen is a real man trap.
Harmonious sounds and beautiful visual effects draw her like a magnet. Most Taurean women have a marked talent for, or an appreciation of music and art. Her doodles on the telephone pad are often very clever draw¬ings. Concerts and art exhibits are a good bet on dates, and Niagara Falls or the Grand Canyon are the best choices for a honeymoon. She'll be ecstatic at the sight of nature's grandeur.
If you can't afford Niagara, take her to an amusement park. She'll probably love to ride on a ferns wheel, feel the sharp wind across her cheeks, watch the colored lights and listen to the calliope music. (The roller coaster will appeal more to her Aries and Gemini sisters.) It's a rare Taurus girl who has never been on a farm nor hiked in the country-who doesn't love horseback riding and fishing. With all her sensuality, the Taurean female is a tomboy at heart. The earth beckons her with a seductive call-and she responds by throwing her arms around Mother Nature in honest rapture. If you want her to throw her arms around you in honest rapture, be sure you don't play raucous music on your record machine, eat garlic without gargling or wear clashing colors.
Finally, there's the sense of touch. Taurus women are the ones who complain that your sweater is "scratchy." It doesn't "feel nice." They can almost tell the color of a fabric by stroking it with their eyes closed. The materials she wears will be soft and luxurious to the touch, never irritating, and she'll probably dress with simplicity and taste. Her sensuous nature may not stretch to include fussy lingerie and dainty clothing (barring a Pisces or Leo ascendant or Moon). She prefers sportswear and plain, expensive outfits with no excess trimmings, and she dresses mostly for comfort; her practical nature taking over in the costume department. If she happens to have a heavy Aquarian influence in her chart, she can go a little cuckoo in stores on occasion, but even then her offbeat selections will serve a utilitarian purpose.
As you get to know her better, you'll realize that this girl can be a tower of strength. She's seldom demanding, except in the area of loyalty, and her disposition is generally even, down-to-earth and pleasant. People love her straightforward, easy-going manner-it's as relaxing as a warm bath. She's probably fond of warm baths herself, with lots of lotions and oils and bubbles. Taurean bathrooms often look like Cleopatra's private quarters. You keep expecting to see a slave appear and start waving a palm leaf fan.
You might have to find out the hard way that a Taurus woman doesn't like to be contradicted, especially in public, but why do that, when you can learn the easy way by understanding her Sun sign? Remember that she likes to do things slowly. If you hurry her or rush her, she'll become angry, and it isn't wise to make a Taurean female angry. Her tempo ranges from slow to deliberate and steady; it seldom raises to impulsive, but it can reach violent, when she's goaded too far.
Motherhood becomes her nicely. It blends smoothly with her serene disposition and matches her bovine nature beautifully. She'll cuddle little babies and adore toddlers, but as the youngsters grow older, she may be too strict and demanding. There's an unbending, stubborn streak in Taurean females that makes it hard for them to accept easily the multiple and confusing changes of adolescence. The Taurus mother becomes angry when her discipline is thwarted. She won't stand for disobedience or defiance. All the fury of the bull is aroused. She'll also find it difficult to tolerate laziness or sloppiness, and the children will prob¬ably keep their rooms neat-or else.
The Taurean love of beauty and harmony prevents calm acceptance of untidy habits. Messy youngsters and sloppy surroundings can make her see red. Outside of these few failings, she'll probably be a good parent, more of a friend to her children than a mother image as the years pass. Most offspring of a May-born woman remember her 'as a warm, maternal image in the early years and a pal with a sense of humor in their later years. The inbetween years-when youthful impatience clashes with the bull's , firm determination-may leave a few unpleasant memories. She'll fiercely and loyally defend them from outside hurts and teach them to imitate her own honest courage.
(Taurus females are never sissies. They seldom whine or complain. This is a woman who will quietly take a job to support a husband in medical school or work at home if there's a temporary financial crisis in the family. She doesn't have a lazy bone in her body, despite her often I slow, deliberate movements and need for frequent rest periods. Taurus females are hard workers. She can climb a stepladder to paint or scrub the walls with the strength of : a man, but she needs that afternoon nap to keep her sturdy. She'll walk proudly beside her man, and seldom try to pass him or stand in his shadow. Many a Taurean wife helps her husband with his studies, if he's taking special courses in a professional career, or types up the business correspondence he brings home from the office. She's an excellent helpmate in these areas. Taureans never expect to be supported without contributing their share, and they're miserable with a man who doesn't contribute his, though they'll try to make the best of it. Taurus women dislike weakness in any form.
Her impassivity to pain and emotional stress is almost miraculous, often even surpassing that of the Scorpio iv-male. I remember a scene I once watched in a hospital. A Taurus woman was going upstairs for serious surgery, so serious that her chances of surviving the operation were very small, and she knew it. It was a calculated risk. As her husband watched her being placed on the cart that would wheel her to the operating area, she noticed the tears in his eyes. But she never commented. She made jokes instead, until the nurses giggled and even the doctor smiled. The last thing her family heard her say as the orderlies were pushing and pulling, trying to get the cart into the elevator, was typically Taurean. Instead of glancing back at her loved ones with a tearful look of farewell, she raised up on one elbow and spoke to the young men firmly. "Before you put me back on this thing again, get some oil and grease those damned wheels." A Taurus woman never lets sentiment interfere with practicality.
A man who marries a female born in May won't marry a cry baby or a gold digger. She'll expect him to provide for her and manage the family finances sensibly. She'll also want the best quality when it comes to food and furnishings. But she'll always keep a sharp eye out for bargains, and be willing to wait for the luxuries she craves.
Quick fortunes without a solid foundation don't appeal to her sense of stability. She'd rather see you build carefully for the future. Making a good impression is important to her, and lots of Taurean women encourage their husbands to aim for a secure future by inviting influential people to dinner. A Taurus wife is the soul of hospitality.
This is a girl who will stay up night after night with a sick child and pray him back to health with a rock-bound faith-the kind of woman who can tenderly replenish a man's store of hope when the world has defeated him, in¬fusing him with her own brave, dauntless example. She's as dependable and predictable as a grandfather clock, as capable of patching a broken pipe or fixing a blown fuse as she is of baking a cherry pie or sewing on a missing button. There's always room enough and love enough in her heart to welcome strangers and relatives to her hearth, and her house will warm you when you've just come in out of a storm. Like my friend said, a Taurus female is "a tall woman."
I remember a conversation I once had with a writer whose mother had been born in May. In discussing her parent's habits and character, the girl happened to mention that "Mother was a tall woman." "You must take after your father then," I remarked, since the girl herself was only of average height. She smiled. And I shall never forget what she said. "I didn't mean in inches. Mother was shorter than I am. That was just soul talk." The girl was a Pisces, the sign that looks deep inside you.
She was right. A Taurus female is a tall woman. Even if she measures under five feet, she can reach tall enough to meet almost any emergency life chooses to throw her way. In many ways, the Taurean female is the salt of the earth, a combination of most of the sterling qualities every male looks for and seldom finds. She may have a violent temper that would frighten a strong man into running for the woods (or at least ducking under a tablecloth), but she won't go on a raging rampage without god provocation. Ordinarily, if you don't torment her beyond human endurance, or if Fate doesn't hand her a really rough bunch of cards, she'll play the game of life freely, with cool, admirable calm. Her candor and basic honesty are undiluted with normal feminine tricks ay tears. The Taurean girl has more moral and emotional courage than many a tough male, but she has enough confidence in her own sex to let you be the boss, if you want the job. If you don't fill it, she may grab control and run things herself, but she'd much rather have it the other way around. She seeks a real man.
That's because she how’s she's a real woman, and she's proud of it. To her, being a woman doesn't necessarily mean being an incorrigible flirt, a mental fluff ball or a mewing kitten who pretends to be weak to get her own way. It won't be long before you see she has a mind of her own, and it's quite strong though not to have to resort to teasing to gain an objective.
There's enough self-control in the average Taurus women make-up to hold back a team of horses (a fair idea of the force of her hidden will), if she chooses to exercise it. Let's hope she does. With an Aries or Leo ascendant 01 Moon, she may be capable of occasional cruelty or frequent emotional storms and with heavy Pisces or Gemini influences in her natal chart, she may be more restless and wavering-but the typical Taurean female practices self restraint in all areas at most times. It's a good thing, because her normally placid exterior conceals a sensual nature that could stand a little checking.
Men always appreciate her gracious tendency to take People as they are, without quibbling. She's as much at h»me with a scientist who studies tsetse flies in the Congo as with the sword swallower in the side show. They're doing what comes naturally; they're not phonies and that's what counts with her. Her close friends may be weird Matures straight out of the world of Toulouse-Lautrec, 01 they may be Norman Rockwell paintings come to life.
But they will be real people, not stuffed shirts or statues. When she runs across someone she dislikes, she doesn't start a big campaign to destroy him or challenge his ideals and motives. She simply avoids him. The Taurus woman can show frigid indifference to her enemies, but if she counts you as a friend, she'll be loyal through all your ups and downs. Her determination to stick with you would make the relationship between Damon and Pythias look like a casual acquaintance.
You can drive a Maxwell, climb a flag pole, get locked up in the pokey or wear daisies in your hair. You are her friend, and somehow she'll justify your actions. There's just a small catch here. She'll doggedly expect you to return her blind allegiance and unswerving loyalty. If you don't give her your complete devotion in return, she can sulk in the comer like a gloomy, gray cloud of repressed resentment.
This isn't the same thing as jealousy, however. The average Taurus woman will take the masculine hobby of girl watching in stride. Unlike the Aries or Leo woman, she won't turn scarlet with rage every time you openly admire a pretty girl. It takes more than a casual flirtation or kissing a good (female) friend goodnight on the cheek to arouse her Taurean anger. If you go beyond the bounds of her idea of fair play, she can be a holy terror on wheels, but the line is drawn with generous strokes. She'll have to be really pressed to the wall in some way to explode in typical Taurus fury. You can go ahead and wink at that attractive cashier, but don't test her patience too far. It does have a limit, boundless as it appears to be. If you've never seen her mad, leave well enough alone.
These women aren't dominated by strictly mental goals. That's not meant to imply that the Taurus female isn't smart and clever. She can match brains with the brightest men and women, but she's not fiercely interested in figuring out the theory of relativity or delving into abstractions. Multiple university degrees don't impress or thrill her. Just one is sufficient to gain her respect. Practical common sense and the ability to understand the fundamentals of any subject is, to her, essential. But the typical Taurean girl isn't an intellectual who reads the philosophers for kicks, and intricate ideologies are not her forte. She's a solid, practical thinker, with no frills or showy mental gymnastics. Her feet are planted on terra firma, and there are definitely no wings attached to her solid heels. Taurus women are seldom restless-they keep their heads and their balance. The Taurean perspective remains normally straight and true, with no twists and turns or distortions (though a Gemini Moon can put her in a bit of a whirl).
She's strictly a physical creature. That will undoubtedly interest you, but to interest her, an object or an idea has to appeal to her finely tuned senses. She doesn't want to hear that it's "good for her," that "everybody else is doing it," or that it will "stimulate her mentally." That sort of persuasion will make her yawn. To respond with genuine excitement, she has to derive some sensual satisfaction from everything she does.
You’ll seldom see a Taurus woman stuffing a few arti¬ficial blooms in a vase. Her flowers must be real, and have am honest feel or fragrance. She'll gather huge bunches off pussywillow and bittersweet in the spring and fall, and fill the house with sturdy mums and dahlias in the summer. Her perfume will usually be exotic and lingering, though some Taurean women lean in the opposite direction, and prefer the odor of squeaking clean hair and skin. Taurus girls will be visibly moved by freshly washed sheets saturated with the sweet smell of sunshine or the delicious aroma of bread baking in the oven. She's spiritually aroused by the scent of the morning paper, the intoxi¬cating odor of newly cut grass after a spring rain, burning wax candles or the smoke from a pile of smoldering autumn leaves. This should clue you to use a good brand o»f shaving lotion, rub some damp newsprint on your ears, tuck a burned leaf in your lapel and turn on the sprinklers just before you kiss her goodnight. Unpleasant odors affect her just as drastically, in a reverse way. This is not a girl who will appreciate a pet skunk, even if he has been de¬odorized. Don't take her on a fish fry unless you take along a can of floral spray. It's the cooking odor that causes the problem. The fragrance of fish fresh out of the stream is different; that's natural. The stables won't offend her delicate nostrils, either. Mother Nature again. You may have to make a careful list if you want to woo her with old factory success.
Colors send her senses soaring, too, the richer the better. Every shade of blue, from powder to indigo, will weaken her strong resistance. So will rose and pink. Wear a blue tie and a shocking pink shirt when you visit her, but not at the same time. Remember, she also has a sense of harmony, and you don't want to look like a co-ed nursery.
Her food must taste just right, and she'll usually sprinkle on the seasoning generously (unless she has a Virgo or Capricorn ascendant). Be sure to take her to places with the best chefs, because flat hamburgers and bland pea soup leave her emotionally cold. If you're lucky, she'll invite you for a home-cooked meal, and you may propose before dessert is served. When this girl ties on an apron, it's not just to make cinnamon toast. It's always a good idea to drop in on her with an empty stomach. A typical Taurus woman can cook her way right into your heart, and her kitchen is a real man trap.
Harmonious sounds and beautiful visual effects draw her like a magnet. Most Taurean women have a marked talent for, or an appreciation of music and art. Her doodles on the telephone pad are often very clever draw¬ings. Concerts and art exhibits are a good bet on dates, and Niagara Falls or the Grand Canyon are the best choices for a honeymoon. She'll be ecstatic at the sight of nature's grandeur.
If you can't afford Niagara, take her to an amusement park. She'll probably love to ride on a ferns wheel, feel the sharp wind across her cheeks, watch the colored lights and listen to the calliope music. (The roller coaster will appeal more to her Aries and Gemini sisters.) It's a rare Taurus girl who has never been on a farm nor hiked in the country-who doesn't love horseback riding and fishing. With all her sensuality, the Taurean female is a tomboy at heart. The earth beckons her with a seductive call-and she responds by throwing her arms around Mother Nature in honest rapture. If you want her to throw her arms around you in honest rapture, be sure you don't play raucous music on your record machine, eat garlic without gargling or wear clashing colors.
Finally, there's the sense of touch. Taurus women are the ones who complain that your sweater is "scratchy." It doesn't "feel nice." They can almost tell the color of a fabric by stroking it with their eyes closed. The materials she wears will be soft and luxurious to the touch, never irritating, and she'll probably dress with simplicity and taste. Her sensuous nature may not stretch to include fussy lingerie and dainty clothing (barring a Pisces or Leo ascendant or Moon). She prefers sportswear and plain, expensive outfits with no excess trimmings, and she dresses mostly for comfort; her practical nature taking over in the costume department. If she happens to have a heavy Aquarian influence in her chart, she can go a little cuckoo in stores on occasion, but even then her offbeat selections will serve a utilitarian purpose.
As you get to know her better, you'll realize that this girl can be a tower of strength. She's seldom demanding, except in the area of loyalty, and her disposition is generally even, down-to-earth and pleasant. People love her straightforward, easy-going manner-it's as relaxing as a warm bath. She's probably fond of warm baths herself, with lots of lotions and oils and bubbles. Taurean bathrooms often look like Cleopatra's private quarters. You keep expecting to see a slave appear and start waving a palm leaf fan.
You might have to find out the hard way that a Taurus woman doesn't like to be contradicted, especially in public, but why do that, when you can learn the easy way by understanding her Sun sign? Remember that she likes to do things slowly. If you hurry her or rush her, she'll become angry, and it isn't wise to make a Taurean female angry. Her tempo ranges from slow to deliberate and steady; it seldom raises to impulsive, but it can reach violent, when she's goaded too far.
Motherhood becomes her nicely. It blends smoothly with her serene disposition and matches her bovine nature beautifully. She'll cuddle little babies and adore toddlers, but as the youngsters grow older, she may be too strict and demanding. There's an unbending, stubborn streak in Taurean females that makes it hard for them to accept easily the multiple and confusing changes of adolescence. The Taurus mother becomes angry when her discipline is thwarted. She won't stand for disobedience or defiance. All the fury of the bull is aroused. She'll also find it difficult to tolerate laziness or sloppiness, and the children will prob¬ably keep their rooms neat-or else.
The Taurean love of beauty and harmony prevents calm acceptance of untidy habits. Messy youngsters and sloppy surroundings can make her see red. Outside of these few failings, she'll probably be a good parent, more of a friend to her children than a mother image as the years pass. Most offspring of a May-born woman remember her 'as a warm, maternal image in the early years and a pal with a sense of humor in their later years. The inbetween years-when youthful impatience clashes with the bull's , firm determination-may leave a few unpleasant memories. She'll fiercely and loyally defend them from outside hurts and teach them to imitate her own honest courage.
(Taurus females are never sissies. They seldom whine or complain. This is a woman who will quietly take a job to support a husband in medical school or work at home if there's a temporary financial crisis in the family. She doesn't have a lazy bone in her body, despite her often I slow, deliberate movements and need for frequent rest periods. Taurus females are hard workers. She can climb a stepladder to paint or scrub the walls with the strength of : a man, but she needs that afternoon nap to keep her sturdy. She'll walk proudly beside her man, and seldom try to pass him or stand in his shadow. Many a Taurean wife helps her husband with his studies, if he's taking special courses in a professional career, or types up the business correspondence he brings home from the office. She's an excellent helpmate in these areas. Taureans never expect to be supported without contributing their share, and they're miserable with a man who doesn't contribute his, though they'll try to make the best of it. Taurus women dislike weakness in any form.
Her impassivity to pain and emotional stress is almost miraculous, often even surpassing that of the Scorpio iv-male. I remember a scene I once watched in a hospital. A Taurus woman was going upstairs for serious surgery, so serious that her chances of surviving the operation were very small, and she knew it. It was a calculated risk. As her husband watched her being placed on the cart that would wheel her to the operating area, she noticed the tears in his eyes. But she never commented. She made jokes instead, until the nurses giggled and even the doctor smiled. The last thing her family heard her say as the orderlies were pushing and pulling, trying to get the cart into the elevator, was typically Taurean. Instead of glancing back at her loved ones with a tearful look of farewell, she raised up on one elbow and spoke to the young men firmly. "Before you put me back on this thing again, get some oil and grease those damned wheels." A Taurus woman never lets sentiment interfere with practicality.
A man who marries a female born in May won't marry a cry baby or a gold digger. She'll expect him to provide for her and manage the family finances sensibly. She'll also want the best quality when it comes to food and furnishings. But she'll always keep a sharp eye out for bargains, and be willing to wait for the luxuries she craves.
Quick fortunes without a solid foundation don't appeal to her sense of stability. She'd rather see you build carefully for the future. Making a good impression is important to her, and lots of Taurean women encourage their husbands to aim for a secure future by inviting influential people to dinner. A Taurus wife is the soul of hospitality.
This is a girl who will stay up night after night with a sick child and pray him back to health with a rock-bound faith-the kind of woman who can tenderly replenish a man's store of hope when the world has defeated him, in¬fusing him with her own brave, dauntless example. She's as dependable and predictable as a grandfather clock, as capable of patching a broken pipe or fixing a blown fuse as she is of baking a cherry pie or sewing on a missing button. There's always room enough and love enough in her heart to welcome strangers and relatives to her hearth, and her house will warm you when you've just come in out of a storm. Like my friend said, a Taurus female is "a tall woman."
I guess it’s a blessing to have such friend that can understand you and give you some enlightenment when you’re feeling down or dumb about something or everything.
Sometimes I chatted with friends and can give ‘em some piece of advice. But, I guess even a dumpster can be full and need to dump what’s inside of it, right?
So, I met this so-called wiseman along my path of friendship. He was a weird and extraordinary person, at least when I first knew him. However, years passed and he actually changed into a different person. Through his stories, I found out that, he was abroad for a while and those experiences kinda changed him, somehow.
I can only say that I’m glad that I met him years ago while he was weird and seemed spoke different language on his own. Now? phiuuhhh…I can only say I have my own spiritual guidance/shrink/good brother, just name it.
It was really good and sweet on the other side of me being able to talk to you. I know I’m being dumb and I know that you keep on talking about how tough I am in facing those kind of problems. I came to realized that I only have to changed my perspective on things. I won’t let myself torture my own soul again. Especially, when my mood swing isn't that good, like having the paranoia feelings toward things or particular someone.
Just let it flow. Don’t hurt myself. Don’t think too much. Don’t bug about things that don’t kill me and stop punishing myself and especially give the love I have to someone that worthy to have it. FULLY!
He said something like, if there are some people that don’t and seems can’t understand when you care for ‘em then don’t punish yourself. Rather than ignore it and have pity on yourself. That’s not good. Stop torturing yourself with your own fears.
Its like a bang in my head, listening to his rants. But, I’m glad to be able to find someone in the wee hours of the nite talking nonsense and his there to listen up. Yup! Us –women- just want to be heard, that’s all and to find someone that can really listening to what you’re blabbering about is bliss.
Thank you, bro! (you know who you are!)
This is the least I can do to thank you. I really appreciate all those sarcasm and also words of wisdom? From you? C’mon! Hahahah… I don’t think that word fit, oh well…
As for your comments about having a bad taste on guys, ehmm…seems you’re not the only one mentioning about it err…I can only say that I don’t judge people by its cover. As long as I can be comfortable around ‘em I would just stay close. But if its not comfortable again, I think I know when I have to bounce
Hope you ALWAYS have a wonderful life, buddy!
A note for myself:
Everything is in ME. If I let myself think differently then its going to be different, if I let myself think it matters than it will matter. In addition, if I let myself lose then I will lose. Especially when I let myself care TOO MUCH about what’s going on around other’s people life, that’s when I need to loosen up. Don’t let the paranoia eat me alive! Let yourself loose, Mei. I guess; I need to think about myself and learn to be an egoistic person too, once in a while. I can’t ever expect from someone else’s to change something inside of me. Its only me that can! YES!
This is truly inspiring note for my own soul.
Finally, I can write something to remind myself about me being stupid and dumb in some path of live. Well, people did. But, I rarely hear ‘em admit their own mistakes. Even sometimes its hard to say ‘ I’m sorry’ to someone.
I’m the type of person that can easily amuse by certain stories, a ‘lil act of kindness, sweet talks, pot of good tea, hugs, silly comments, stupid remarks, any kind of surprises (never experience it tho), good songs, good movies, Amaretto DiSarrono also Boltz Creme de Cassis even just to cuddle up with special someone or friends, last but not least making conversation in any topics that revolve around…
Aha! :)
Who are you out there that can join me in happiness?
heheh...come along then!
Sometimes I chatted with friends and can give ‘em some piece of advice. But, I guess even a dumpster can be full and need to dump what’s inside of it, right?
So, I met this so-called wiseman along my path of friendship. He was a weird and extraordinary person, at least when I first knew him. However, years passed and he actually changed into a different person. Through his stories, I found out that, he was abroad for a while and those experiences kinda changed him, somehow.
I can only say that I’m glad that I met him years ago while he was weird and seemed spoke different language on his own. Now? phiuuhhh…I can only say I have my own spiritual guidance/shrink/good brother, just name it.
It was really good and sweet on the other side of me being able to talk to you. I know I’m being dumb and I know that you keep on talking about how tough I am in facing those kind of problems. I came to realized that I only have to changed my perspective on things. I won’t let myself torture my own soul again. Especially, when my mood swing isn't that good, like having the paranoia feelings toward things or particular someone.
Just let it flow. Don’t hurt myself. Don’t think too much. Don’t bug about things that don’t kill me and stop punishing myself and especially give the love I have to someone that worthy to have it. FULLY!
He said something like, if there are some people that don’t and seems can’t understand when you care for ‘em then don’t punish yourself. Rather than ignore it and have pity on yourself. That’s not good. Stop torturing yourself with your own fears.
Its like a bang in my head, listening to his rants. But, I’m glad to be able to find someone in the wee hours of the nite talking nonsense and his there to listen up. Yup! Us –women- just want to be heard, that’s all and to find someone that can really listening to what you’re blabbering about is bliss.
Thank you, bro! (you know who you are!)
This is the least I can do to thank you. I really appreciate all those sarcasm and also words of wisdom? From you? C’mon! Hahahah… I don’t think that word fit, oh well…
As for your comments about having a bad taste on guys, ehmm…seems you’re not the only one mentioning about it err…I can only say that I don’t judge people by its cover. As long as I can be comfortable around ‘em I would just stay close. But if its not comfortable again, I think I know when I have to bounce
Hope you ALWAYS have a wonderful life, buddy!
A note for myself:
Everything is in ME. If I let myself think differently then its going to be different, if I let myself think it matters than it will matter. In addition, if I let myself lose then I will lose. Especially when I let myself care TOO MUCH about what’s going on around other’s people life, that’s when I need to loosen up. Don’t let the paranoia eat me alive! Let yourself loose, Mei. I guess; I need to think about myself and learn to be an egoistic person too, once in a while. I can’t ever expect from someone else’s to change something inside of me. Its only me that can! YES!
This is truly inspiring note for my own soul.
Finally, I can write something to remind myself about me being stupid and dumb in some path of live. Well, people did. But, I rarely hear ‘em admit their own mistakes. Even sometimes its hard to say ‘ I’m sorry’ to someone.
I’m the type of person that can easily amuse by certain stories, a ‘lil act of kindness, sweet talks, pot of good tea, hugs, silly comments, stupid remarks, any kind of surprises (never experience it tho), good songs, good movies, Amaretto DiSarrono also Boltz Creme de Cassis even just to cuddle up with special someone or friends, last but not least making conversation in any topics that revolve around…
Aha! :)
Who are you out there that can join me in happiness?
heheh...come along then!
Andy Dufresne: there are places in this world that aren't made out of stone. That there's something inside... that they can't get to, that they can't touch. That's yours.Red:What're you talking about?
Andy Dufresne: Hope.
Shawshank Redemption
Sepertinya belakangan ini selalu nonton film gak jauh dari penjara, emang lebih dulu nonton PRISON BREAK baru nonton The Shawshank Redemption. Kedua film ini keren emang! Yang satu adalah TV serial dan yang satu lagi adalah film lepas.
Dan kalo mau diliat lagi jalan ceritanya, gak jauh beda siy. 2-2nya punya misi untuk keluar dari penjara, dan bisa dibilang klo PRISON BREAK bisa jadi dibuat karna dapet inspirasi dari film Shawshank ini. Tapi kita gak pernah tau juga gimana tepatnya.
Yang jelas kedua film tersebut gue rekomendasi untuk ditonton deh.
Film lain:
Seducing Mr. Perfect (Korean)
Hannibal Rising
Heroes 1C
Prison Break Season 1-3
Siang itu, telepon genggam berbunyi, terlihat dari nomer tak terdaftar.
"Halo?"
"Ta.." suara isak tangis terdengar.
Oh aku mengenali suaranya
"Gue ijin gak masuk yah, tolong bilangin Nana. Suami gue masuk RS gak sadarkan diri"
"Oh ya udah, ntar gue telp Nana deh. Emang kenapa tiba-tiba masuk RS?"
"Gue masih gak tau, Ta. Soalnya baru ajah masuk." Katanya lagi.
"ya udah. Sabar yah, Mba"
Beberapa jam kemudian...
Kembali telepon genggam berbunyi memekakan telinga, mengganggu istirahatku saja. Sedikit menggerutu aku mengangkatnya..
"Ya?"
"Mba..." terdapat jeda dan sedikit kaget dalam nada suaranya.
"kenapa, Na?" ujarku tak sabar
"Suaminya mba Tati meninggal.."
Bagaikan palu godam menghantam kepala, aku langsung bangun terduduk ditepi tempat tidurku.
"Dapat kabar darimana, Na?"
"Tadi aku dah coba telp sorean, Mba. Tapi telp Mba Tati gak bisa dihubungin. Trus barusan Mba Tati telp kesini, ngabarin. Aku aja kaget dengernya."
Menarik napas panjang
"Ya udah. Makasih ya, Na. Nanti aku coba telp Mba Tati deh"
Aku mencoba mengabarkan berita duka kepada atasan yang sedang sibuk rapat hari ini. Tak peduli bagaimana ribetnya rapat, yang penting adalah menyampaikan berita padanya.
Setelah itu, kembali telepon berdering. Kali ini dari orang yang berduka, terdengar isak tangis diujung lain. Aku hanya bisa menyampaikan belasungkawa, dan berjanji akan berkunjung esok hari.
Tabahkan hatimu, Mba
Percayalah jika dirinya telah berada ditempat terindah,
dan telah berbahagia...
Doa kami menyertaimu dan keluarga besar
= Di dedikasikan untuk SPG tercinta yang ditinggal pergi=
Banyak hal yang dapat ditulis belakangan ini, tapi rasanya susah sekali untuk mengungkapkannya dengan kata-kata. FAKTA bahwa segala hal yang berhubungan dengan manusia kadang memang SELALU menjengkelkan dan makan hati. Tapi, selagi masih bernapas di muka bumi ini, rasanya TIDAK MUNGKIN untuk tidak berhubungan dengan manusia satu sama lain, se-menyebalkan APAPUN sebuah hubungan itu, antar teman, antar atasan-bawahan, antar selingkuhan, antar teman baik bahkan antar mantan pacar dan mantan teman sekalipun.
Bahkan ada juga orang-orang yang mengakui tidak pernah cemburu atau tidak pernah merasakan apa itu cemburu, suatu saat bisa juga merasakan apa itu cemburu.
Juga orang yang mengatakan bahwa dirinya tidak pernah bisa merasakan apa itu rasa 'sayang' tapi bagaimanapun pasti dirinya PERNAH merasakan hal itu, jika memang tidak pernah rasanya orang itu tidak bisa disebut sebagai manusia. Vampir mungkin?
Hanya terkadang perbedaannya berada dalam tahap PENGAKUAN. Terhadap diri sendiri atau kepada lingkungan sekitarnya.
Apakah dengan mengakui dan mengungkapkan perasaan diri itu berarti dirinya terlihat lemah? Menurutku, sama sekali tidak.
Entah bagi kalian yang pernah melihat orang-orang seperti itu dalam perjalanan waktu yang telah kalian tempuh.
Apakah dengan mencoba mendalami perasaan seseorang dan mencoba untuk memberikan sedikit tetesan 'sayang' pada hati orang yang tidak dapat merasa juga salah?
Menurutku hal ini juga tidak salah.
Sebenarnya tinggal bagaimana kita mengambil sikap dalam menghadapi hidup dalam hal yang berhubungan dengan perasaan ini dan bagaimana kita merasakan hidup itu sendiri hidup dalam diri kita.
"Halo?"
"Ta.." suara isak tangis terdengar.
Oh aku mengenali suaranya
"Gue ijin gak masuk yah, tolong bilangin Nana. Suami gue masuk RS gak sadarkan diri"
"Oh ya udah, ntar gue telp Nana deh. Emang kenapa tiba-tiba masuk RS?"
"Gue masih gak tau, Ta. Soalnya baru ajah masuk." Katanya lagi.
"ya udah. Sabar yah, Mba"
Beberapa jam kemudian...
Kembali telepon genggam berbunyi memekakan telinga, mengganggu istirahatku saja. Sedikit menggerutu aku mengangkatnya..
"Ya?"
"Mba..." terdapat jeda dan sedikit kaget dalam nada suaranya.
"kenapa, Na?" ujarku tak sabar
"Suaminya mba Tati meninggal.."
Bagaikan palu godam menghantam kepala, aku langsung bangun terduduk ditepi tempat tidurku.
"Dapat kabar darimana, Na?"
"Tadi aku dah coba telp sorean, Mba. Tapi telp Mba Tati gak bisa dihubungin. Trus barusan Mba Tati telp kesini, ngabarin. Aku aja kaget dengernya."
Menarik napas panjang
"Ya udah. Makasih ya, Na. Nanti aku coba telp Mba Tati deh"
Aku mencoba mengabarkan berita duka kepada atasan yang sedang sibuk rapat hari ini. Tak peduli bagaimana ribetnya rapat, yang penting adalah menyampaikan berita padanya.
Setelah itu, kembali telepon berdering. Kali ini dari orang yang berduka, terdengar isak tangis diujung lain. Aku hanya bisa menyampaikan belasungkawa, dan berjanji akan berkunjung esok hari.
Tabahkan hatimu, Mba
Percayalah jika dirinya telah berada ditempat terindah,
dan telah berbahagia...
Doa kami menyertaimu dan keluarga besar
= Di dedikasikan untuk SPG tercinta yang ditinggal pergi=
Banyak hal yang dapat ditulis belakangan ini, tapi rasanya susah sekali untuk mengungkapkannya dengan kata-kata. FAKTA bahwa segala hal yang berhubungan dengan manusia kadang memang SELALU menjengkelkan dan makan hati. Tapi, selagi masih bernapas di muka bumi ini, rasanya TIDAK MUNGKIN untuk tidak berhubungan dengan manusia satu sama lain, se-menyebalkan APAPUN sebuah hubungan itu, antar teman, antar atasan-bawahan, antar selingkuhan, antar teman baik bahkan antar mantan pacar dan mantan teman sekalipun.
Bahkan ada juga orang-orang yang mengakui tidak pernah cemburu atau tidak pernah merasakan apa itu cemburu, suatu saat bisa juga merasakan apa itu cemburu.
Juga orang yang mengatakan bahwa dirinya tidak pernah bisa merasakan apa itu rasa 'sayang' tapi bagaimanapun pasti dirinya PERNAH merasakan hal itu, jika memang tidak pernah rasanya orang itu tidak bisa disebut sebagai manusia. Vampir mungkin?
Hanya terkadang perbedaannya berada dalam tahap PENGAKUAN. Terhadap diri sendiri atau kepada lingkungan sekitarnya.
Apakah dengan mengakui dan mengungkapkan perasaan diri itu berarti dirinya terlihat lemah? Menurutku, sama sekali tidak.
Entah bagi kalian yang pernah melihat orang-orang seperti itu dalam perjalanan waktu yang telah kalian tempuh.
Apakah dengan mencoba mendalami perasaan seseorang dan mencoba untuk memberikan sedikit tetesan 'sayang' pada hati orang yang tidak dapat merasa juga salah?
Menurutku hal ini juga tidak salah.
Sebenarnya tinggal bagaimana kita mengambil sikap dalam menghadapi hidup dalam hal yang berhubungan dengan perasaan ini dan bagaimana kita merasakan hidup itu sendiri hidup dalam diri kita.
The Tao Te King says:
Keep the sensitive soul and the animal body in one compartment so that they cannot be separated.
Control the vital force, so that you will be transformed again into a newborn child.
When you banish mysterious visions from your imagination you may, then, become unblemished.
Purify yourself and don’t look for intellectual answers for the Mystery.
When discernment penetrates the four regions, perhaps you will not recognize what gives life and sustains it.
That which gives life does not claim any possession. It benefits, but does not demand gratitude. It commands, but does not exercise authority. That is what is called “mysterious quality”.
Paolo Coelho
Oleh meiWIN
Musim Hujan, 2001
Tetes air hujan masih terus membasahi Bumi. Membuat genangan air pada jalanan yang tidak rata. Masih saja ada orang yang lalu lalang, seakan tak peduli akan tetesan-tetesan air yang jatuh. Ada yang memakai payung, ada yang menutupi kepalanya dengan koran, ada juga yang memakai jaket tanpa pelindung kepala. Namun aku lebih suka tanpa pelindung. Merasakan seluruh tubuhku basah, oleh tetesan air hujan. Karena aku tahu bahwa sebentar lagi tetesan air ini akan berhenti. Jadi aku hanya menikmatinya saja, selagi ia turun membasahi jalanan yang berdebu. Basahi kepala dan hati yang sedang panas.
Entah sudah berapa lama aku berjalan tanpa tujuan, kubiarkan saja kakiku melangkah. Menikmati sore. Rasanya tetesan itu sudah berhenti, kutadahkan tangan untuk memastikannya. Aku kembali melangkah, sambil berharap dapat melihat pelangi setelah hujan turun. Mungkin sebentar lagi, mungkin juga tidak sama sekali. Tak terasa aku kembali lagi ketempat tadi, dimana aku mulai melangkah. Sepertinya, aku harus berhenti sebentar untuk mengambil nafas panjang. Hmmm…leganya. Bersih sekali udara sehabis hujan. Aku begitu menikmatinya. Adakah orang lain yang ikut menikmati keindahan suasana seperti ini selain diriku? Entahlah, bisa ada, bisa tidak.
Lembayung senja sudah menampakkan diri. Serasa tidak mau kalah untuk menunjukan kecantikannya setelah hujan turun. Memberikan warna jingga kekuningan diufuk Barat. Indah sekali! Seandainya aku bisa mengabadikan semuanya dalam kamera. Sayangnya, tidak aku bawa. Hanya lewat memori yang ada dikepala saja, yang tidak akan bisa dihapus, semuanya itu aku rekam dalam benakku. Kupejamkan mataku, sambil membayangkan suasana yang tercipta saat ini.
“Indah yah?”
Tiba-tiba terdengar suara bariton disebelahku, membuatku agak tersentak.
“Eh, mmm…iya…mm”
“Biasanya hanya aku sendirian disini, menikmati senja.” Ujarnya lagi.
Aku tak berkata apapun, membiarkan komentarnya mengalir.
“Tak kusangka, seorang gadis seperti kamu berani jalan sendirian, dan menemukan tempat persembunyianku.”
Katanya lagi, namun kali ini dengan menolehkan wajahnya kearahku.
“Mmm…maaf. Sepertinya tempat ini bukan milik pribadi, jika mengganggu sebaiknya saya pergi sekarang.” Jawabku membalas ucapannya.
Tanpa pamit aku langsung berjalan, untuk kembali ke tempatku. Namun, sebuah tangan tiba-tiba menahan lenganku, sehingga secepatnya aku berbalik dan memberikan sebuah pandangan tidak suka padanya.
“Maaf…” katanya, sambil melepaskan pegangannya.
Sepertinya ia mengerti maksud pandanganku padanya.
“Maaf kalo aku kurang ajar, boleh aku tau namamu?” tanyanya lagi, kali ini dengan begitu sopan.
Mungkin ia takut aku benar-benar marah dan menamparnya atas tindakannya itu. Kembali aku melihatnya, kali ini aku tidak takut untuk langsung melihat sosok orang dihadapanku ini, dengan menatap matanya. Cukup lama aku menatapnya, hingga dapat merasakan ketulusan dimatanya yaitu tatapan penuh harap atas pertanyaan yang masih belum kujawab.
“Apakah penting?” ujarku.
“Bagiku? Ya. Entah bagimu?!” katanya lagi, dengan masa bodoh.
Sambil menunjukkan senyum simpulnya.
“Apa artinya namaku bagimu?” jawabku tak mau kalah.
Tak peduli akan senyum, yang ia tujukan padaku. Entah apa maksudnya memberikan senyuman itu padaku.
“Nanti kau akan tau artinya? So, siapa namamu?” kembali ia menjawab, kali ini dengan sedikit tekanan pada nadanya. Kembali aku melihatnya. Lalu kujawab,
“Hening”
Seperti tak peduli akan kehadirannya, aku langsung berjalan setelah memberikan namaku padanya. Aku tak peduli lagi untuk menanyakan kembali siapa namanya. Terus terang aku memang tak peduli. Karena aku yakin bahwa aku akan sangat jarang bertemu dengan orang seperti dia didaerah ini. Atau bisa juga aku tidak akan bertemu dengannya lagi. Lalu, aku berjalan pulang tanpa memikirkannya lagi.
Hanya terdapat perasaan nyaman dan tenang hadir mengisi relung hatiku…pertanda apakah gerangan? Biarlah…kita lihat saja nanti…
*
Kesal aku dibuatnya! Apa sih maksud makhluk satu tadi mengganggu keasikanku menikmati alam. Sudah tahu indah…yah diamlah…alam kan bisa dinikmati tanpa memberikan komentar. Errgghh…sebel!! Udah begitu sok jadi gentleman lagi. Hhhh…aku menarik nafas dalam-dalam. Katanya menarik nafas akan sedikit menghilangkan kekesalan yang ada didalam dada. Aku tidak mau hanya gara-gara orang itu sore hari yang indah setelah turun hujan akan menjadi mendung kembali karena keisengan orang lain. Kucoba kembali menarik nafas dan mengulum senyum, hmm…ternyata bisa! Kuteruskan kembali perjalanan ke kost.Kost…hhh…kalo di ingat kembali susah juga yah, tapi yang jelas sekarang aku ada kost karena jarak rumahku ke kampus lumayan jauh. Sehingga, membuat orang dirumah, terutama Bunda khawatir, karena aku sering pulang malam, baik itu nongkrong sama teman-teman atau memang ada kelas sampai malam. Ia pikir daripada anak perempuan satu-satunya celaka, maka ia memintaku untuk mencari tempat kost. Kebetulan aku menemukan sebuah tempat kost yang lumayan asik. Kenapa lumayan? Karena aku tidak bisa menyelinapkan laki-laki ke kamar. Heheheh…rasanya tidak ada yang melarang mempunyai pikiran seperti itu, toh hanya pikiran iseng yang terlintas. Tidak dapat direalisasikan…sudahlah…jangan diteruskan.
Akhirnya sampai juga kakiku di kost tercinta ini. Bajuku basah sedikit, akibat tetesan hujan tadi itu. Tapi, toh memang sudah waktunya untuk mandi. Setelah itu bisa mengajak yang lain untuk makan malam. Senangnya hatiku. Sambil mandi, aku memikirkan menu makan malam apa yang enak untuk nanti. Sepertinya semua sama saja, hampir menu makanan sederhana sudah aku cicipi. Siomay? Bosan. Mie instant? Masa mie melulu, bisa mati rasa nanti perutku, menerima mie terus menerus. Lalu, apa ya? Sudahlah, lihat saja nanti. Yang lain mau makan kemana…toh sama saja. Belum juga selesai aku mengelap seluruh badanku, terdengar panggilan dari luar.
“Kenapa?” tanyaku.
“Mau ikut makan sama-sama?” ujar suara diluar.
“Iya! Tunggu aku yah!!” kataku lagi dengan semangat. “Jangan ditinggal..!!”
Lalu aku segera keluar dari kamar mandi dan ganti baju. Tidak lama aku dan beberapa orang teman sudah duduk dan memesan makanan. Ternyata bertemu dengan beberapa teman juga, yang sudah lebih dulu datang. Sambil menunggu kita ngobrol kesana kemari. Tiba-tiba disebelah terdengar suara orang sedang memainkan gitarnya, aku merasa bahwa aku mengenal suara orang tersebut. Jangan-jangan…tapi, sudahlah tidak perlu berpikir sejauh itu. Belum tentu dia! Semakin lama suara tersebut semakin dekat, apakah ia pengamen? Aku merasakan bahwa darah dimukaku hilang entah kemana. Ternyata memang dia! Orang yang kutemui tadi sore, sedang asik memainkan gitarnya dimeja depan, tidak jauh dari mejaku dan teman-teman. Aku berharap, bahwa ia tidak akan melihatku duduk disini dan teman-temanku pun tidak akan melihat perubahan wajahku. Sepertinya ia sudah selesai menyanyikan lagu dan beranjak pergi tanpa melihat kearahku. Hhh…aku bernafas lega. Kembali aku berusaha mengikuti percakapan yang terjadi diantara teman-temanku. Sambil menenangkan debar jantungku kembali normal, agar darah yang tadi sempat hilang dari wajahku kembali normal. Belum selesai rasanya aku mencoba untuk tenang, tiba-tiba…
“Sepertinya tadi aku melihat dia deh?” kata Putri
“Siapa?” Atet bertanya.
“Iya, siapa Put?” Reni juga ikut bertanya.
“Itu. Pengamen misterius kesayangan kita. Hehehe…” kata Putri lagi sambil tersenyum simpul.
“Yang bener?!” sahut Atet dan Reni hampir bersamaan.
“Masa aku bohong sih? Gak percaya tanya aja Hening. Iya kan?” jawabnya sambil mencari pembelaan padaku.
“Eh…apa? Yang mana?” jawabku masa bodoh. Pura-pura tidak mengerti.
“Pengamen yang tadi itu loh! Masa sih kamu gak liat?” ujar Putri tidak mau kalah.
“Ooo..yang tadi ada dimeja depan? Itu sih liat.” Kataku menjawab datar.
“Memangnya kenapa dengan dia?” tanyaku lagi ingin tau.
“Akh, gak koq. Kita cuma sering liat dia aja ngamen disini, saat makan malam. Lumayan keren loh orangnya. Hehehe…” Atet memberikan penjelasan sedikit.
“Ooo…itu.” Hanya itu yang keluar dari mulutku.
Selesai aku menanggapi itu, aku kembali melihat orang tadi. Masuk kedalam dan berjalan kearah tempatku duduk. Oh…NO!!! secara tidak sadar, aku langsung membuang muka dan pura-pura tidak melihat. Lalu menundukkan kepalaku sedikit, sehingga tidak melihat postur tubuhnya. Tapi percuma, ternyata ia memang melihatku duduk dimeja ini, dan ia mulai memainkan lagunya. Aku merasakan wajahku seperti terbakar. Sepertinya keinginanku untuk mengembalikan darah kemukaku tadi, terkabul. Entah kenapa, antara marah dan kesal, tetapi juga bukan benci padanya. Malukah aku?
Permainan gitarnya bagus. Sepertinya terlatih, selain itu juga gitar yang dipeluknya, bukan gitar asal bunyi yang layaknya dipakai oleh pengamen-pengamen lain. Ada yang lain dari gitar itu, walaupun terlihat sudah tua. Tapi suara yang dihasilkan dari sebuah gitar tua, sungguh bersih dan enak terdengar ditelingaku. Jarang sekali aku merasakan sensasi seperti ini dari seorang pengamen. Siapakah dia?
Sepertinya ia menyanyikan lagu yang dibuat olehnya sendiri atau oleh dari pencipta lagu yang tidak aku kenal. Yang jelas, aku tidak pernah mendengar lagu ini dimainkan oleh radio, video musiknya diputar oleh MTV, atau dinyanyikan oleh pengamen yang lain. Sama sekali tidak. Suaranya pas sekali dengan nada-nada gitar dan alunan itu membuat getaran yang begitu harmonis. Mungkin bisa dibilang membuat orang terlena. Aku melihat teman-temanku satu meja, terhipnotis oleh sosok, permainan dan lagunya. Siapakah gerangan yang mempunyai karisma begitu besar? Sehingga membuat orang-orang disekelilingku menoleh, atau setidaknya menikmati permainannya?
Ia tetap bermain dengan santainya, seperti tidak peduli dengan keadaan disekelilingnya. Seakan-akan ia sudah terbiasa menjadi pusat perhatian banyak orang. Satu hal yang membuatku bingung adalah, ia bernyanyi sambil tetap menatapku. Tanpa melepaskan sedikitpun pandangannya untuk orang lain. Maksudnya apa sih? Aku juga sudah tidak peduli lagi dengan pandangan matanya itu, selain itu aku juga tertolong dengan datangnya makanan yang kupesan. Jadi aku menikmati saja santapan makan malamku, nyanyiannya aku anggap sebagai hiburan atau selingan tambahan agar sajian dihadapanku semakin sedap.
“Eh…cuek banget sih kamu?” tanya salah satu temanku.
“Sepertinya dia nyanyi khusus buat kamu deh, Ning?” kali ini Atet berkomentar.
“Biar saja. Aku toh gak minta dia untuk nyanyi!” kataku ketus.
Tapi seakan tidak peduli ia tetap saja menyanyi dan menyanyi. Rasanya permainannya tidak akan selesai. Jika aku ingin jujur, aku juga masih ingin tetap mendengarnya memainkan gitar tersebut. Apa? Akh!! Tidak…tidak…ini tidak boleh terjadi. Langsung kutepis jauh-jauh pikiran ku tadi. Tapi secara tidak sengaja aku ingin melihat wajahnya, dan kulihat ia tersenyum puas! Bukan senyum seorang laki-laki yang terpesona oleh seorang perempuan. Tetapi sepotong senyuman yang dapat memberikan arti bahwa AKU MENANG! Senyuman meledek! Yah, itu dia! Senyuman meledek…dan ia telah meledekku tanpa orang lain tahu, dan aku juga tahu bahwa ia sengaja melakukannya. Kurang ajar…awas kau!! Tak akan kubiarkan orang seperti kau melakukan hal ini padaku.
Sudah tak selera rasanya untuk menghabiskan makanan dihadapanku ini. Tapi tidak boleh dibuang, harus kuhabiskan. Perutku tidak pantas disiksa hanya karena orang gila yang sedang main gitar itu. Lalu, tanpa diharapkan tiba-tiba suara itu berhenti, dan semua orang didalam rumah makan itu langsung bertepuk tangan untuknya. Iiiihhhh…kesal!! Lalu, ia berjalan kearahku, tetap tidak peduli dengan semuanya, seolah-olah ia hanya melihat diriku saja. Aku ingin bangun dari tempatku, tapi rasanya kakiku tidak dapat diangkat. Kaku sekali. Sebel!!kenapa disaat seperti ini malah mereka tidak bisa diajak bekerja sama dengan otakku…errrgghh!
Ia lalu menggunakan kesempatan itu untuk memberikan sesuatu padaku, sambil membisikkan,
“Kamu tidak dapat sembunyi dariku, sebab kamu adalah belahan jiwaku…”
setelah itu ia pergi dan tidak menoleh kembali, uang yang disediakan oleh semua orang yang mendengarkan nyanyiannya dibiarkannya saja, ia hanya memberikan ucapan terima kasih dan senyumannya pada mereka. Lalu hilang…entah…kemana…seperti ditelan bumi.
Teman-temanku heboh! Aku tak tahu lagi harus menjawab mereka apa, sepertinya aku mendengar suara nyamuk berdengung ditelingaku. Aku terganggu oleh suara ceracau mereka. Ok! Aku harus segera pergi dari tempat ini…
“Maaf…aku duluan yah!” kataku tegas.
Dan aku tidak peduli lagi dengan jawaban-jawaban mereka yang berusaha menahanku. Kubayar makanan tadi, dan aku berjalan pulang. Hhhh…lega rasanya, menghirup udara malam, yang menyisakan hujan. Untuk sementara, aku tidak ingin memikirkan kejadian tadi, dan apa maksudnya. Aku sudah pusing dan bosan untuk berpikir hari ini. Suntuk!!
Tiba dikamar, langsung kurebahkan diriku dan kupejamkan mataku…tanpa ada pikiran apapun. Kupejamkan mataku, sambil menarik nafas dalam-dalam. Lega sekali…kemudian aku bangun, dan mengganti bajuku dengan baju tidur. Namun, sesuatu terjatuh dari pakaianku. Aduh…apa lagi sih? Kuletakkan bajuku ditumpukan baju kotor lainnya, lalu kembali ketempat tidur dan membuka kertas itu.
Isinya ternyata sebaris puisi, prosa atau apalah aku juga tidak mengerti, yang jelas tulisan itu bagiku hanya sekedar ungkapan perasaan seseorang. Aku tahu kertas ini pasti diselipkan orang gila itu padaku, ketika ia membisikkan sesuatu tadi. Tapi apa maksudnya?
Ketika Raga dan Sukma menyatu,
Jadilah Aku…Jiwa.
Ketika Sunyi dan Senyap menyatu,
Jadilah Engkau…Hening.
Ketika Jiwa dan Hening menyatu,
Maka belahan jiwa pun menjadi satu.
Kupejamkan sekali lagi mataku, seakan tak percaya membaca tulisan ditanganku. Jadi namanya Jiwa? Pantas semua orang seperti tersihir mendengarnya menyanyi, mendengar namanya saja aku sudah merinding dibuatnya. Bagaimana mungkin dia bilang aku adalah belahan jiwanya? Sedangkan bertemu saja baru sekarang…dan tiap kali melihatnya semua perasaan bercampur menjadi satu. Susah sekali melukiskan perasaan itu, mungkinkah yang ia bicarakan benar? Gila! Sepertinya kalau aku tidak lekas-lekas tidur, aku akan gila seperti dia…
Jam dikamar hampir menunjukan pukul 24.00, saatnya bagiku untuk tidur…kumatikan lampu, dan kuletakkan sobekan kertas tadi di meja belajarku, dan aku pun terlelap…menantikan hari esok yang lebih indah…
***
[Minggu, 7 Oktober 2001]
= CAHAYA ABADIKU =
Cerita tentang masalalu tidak akan pernah ada habisnya, selayaknya melihat awan yang akan tetap berarak dilangit esok hari. Demikian juga kurasakan artimu dalam hidupku. Ribuan detik berlalu, menjadi tahun yang menumpuk menjadikan masa kini.
Berada dalam pelukanmu saat hati pecah,
Berada dalam hening saat pedihmu…
Semua itu kita jalani dengan apa adanya, ada saat tidak ada sebentang cerita dalam ratusan detik. Namun, terbayar dengan pertemuan walau hanya dengan beberapa patah kata dan ulasan juga senyuman, diiringi pelukan selamat jalan saat aku harus berlalu kembali ke peraduan sunyi.
Entah sampai kapan asa ini tetap membara dalam hati
Semoga akan tetap menjadi bara api abadi…
Karena kamu adalah satu diantara sekian banyak bintang dilangit yang akan tetap terus bersinar pada saat aku membutuhkan cahayamu, diantara gulitanya malam.
Kaulah cahaya yang berpendar hangatkan jiwa yang mulai melemah…
Tetaplah menjadi cahaya terang bagiku dan bagi semua orang yang berada disekelilingmu…
Bercahayalah terus!
=Selamat Ulang Tahun, Rex!=
===============
Hehehe...lengkap sudah kado yang dijanjiin!
Enjoy another year of your life, dear one :)
Cerita tentang masalalu tidak akan pernah ada habisnya, selayaknya melihat awan yang akan tetap berarak dilangit esok hari. Demikian juga kurasakan artimu dalam hidupku. Ribuan detik berlalu, menjadi tahun yang menumpuk menjadikan masa kini.
Berada dalam pelukanmu saat hati pecah,
Berada dalam hening saat pedihmu…
Semua itu kita jalani dengan apa adanya, ada saat tidak ada sebentang cerita dalam ratusan detik. Namun, terbayar dengan pertemuan walau hanya dengan beberapa patah kata dan ulasan juga senyuman, diiringi pelukan selamat jalan saat aku harus berlalu kembali ke peraduan sunyi.
Entah sampai kapan asa ini tetap membara dalam hati
Semoga akan tetap menjadi bara api abadi…
Karena kamu adalah satu diantara sekian banyak bintang dilangit yang akan tetap terus bersinar pada saat aku membutuhkan cahayamu, diantara gulitanya malam.
Kaulah cahaya yang berpendar hangatkan jiwa yang mulai melemah…
Tetaplah menjadi cahaya terang bagiku dan bagi semua orang yang berada disekelilingmu…
Bercahayalah terus!
=Selamat Ulang Tahun, Rex!=
===============
Hehehe...lengkap sudah kado yang dijanjiin!
Enjoy another year of your life, dear one :)
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ABOUT AUTHOR
This is Meita’s website and you are in a right place to get to know a little bit more about her. She is a dreamer who likes doing digital marketing and been blogging since 2003. She also loves watching TV shows, and movies. Also, passionate about the world. Graduated from the University of Indonesia majoring in Cultural Tourism, taught her a lot about how great Indonesia – country where she is from – in cultural level. Still curious about her? Find out more here ;)
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